My life-Chapter 1
by HOAmonalisa12
Summary: Summary inside. Rated t for cutting, suicide and ect.
1. Feelings

**Hi everyone, just to let you know, this is ****not**** the sequal to my story ,****Love****. About the sequal, many(2) peaple were kinda hinting that Patricia shouldn't be preg, so I don't really know what to do for the sequal. If you have an idea, or a story that I can read that can give me an idea, leave a comment(or review). This story, is either going to updated every day, every other day, or every week(I haven't decided yet). Also, if you have a couple you want to add, I will put some of it (just remember to say friendship or romance next to it) This story however, is going to be about my favorite character,Patricia, and about her life. This will probably only going to be 3-5 chapters. Just to let you know, I am SUPER sad about PEDDIE breakin' up, I am hurt and no hard feelings for Palfie, Patrome, Pabian, Poy, Pick, Para, Patina, ect. shippers out there ,but Eddie and Patricia belong together. One thing however, I will admit, Patricia seems more sad than Eddie. But anyways...**

_Patricia's POV _

She was the girl in his dreams. Is this who he had be talking to ALL summer ,or when I was with him. I should have known though, love doesn't exist. I mean, it drove my parents, Piper and Leo Halliwell, insane 'till my dad killed himself then my mom felt so bad, she soon did to. It caused my Aunt Pheobe**(for Charmed fans out there, Charmed is kinda in here) **to die alone, or so I heard. Plus, my Aunt Peige died protecting her husband because she was "in love". If love existed why would it do such horrible things. I dunno, maybe it's me. The day I was born, according to my family, everything went wrong and when I was born, bad things happened around me and good things happened around Piper. I will admit, I broke up with Eddie, but it was because protecting him.

"Protecting him from what," you may ask. From me. I'm ugly,worthless, unloved, alone, bad luck, uncared for, a real bitch, and I dress like a slut. I don't know why I'm alive. The world seems to love Piper, K.T, Willow, and Nina much more than me. I'm an outcast.

I see the way he looks at me then the way he looks at K.T. For me, it's hate, confusion, and pitty. For her, it's like, she-is-so-pretty, the complete oppisite of me. I can't blame him.

My life is in a hellhole. I want to escape but I can't. I quess I'll play it through like I always do.

**Well that was chapter 1. Leave a comment saying if it was good, any ideas, or telling me what i did wrong. :P**


	2. Job, and PEDDIE

My job. It's hard. I am a singer for this club, but no one can no it's MY voice. Sucks, right. I wish someone can know, then maybe people would like me. Oh well.

I entered the bathroom and removed my cloths to take a shower. I began to sing _Bring me to life _by Evanescence.

_How can see through my eyes, like open doors_

_Leading you down into my core, where I become so numb_

_Without a sou-oh-oh-l,_

_My spirt's sleeping somewhere cold_

_Untill you find it there and lead it back home_

_Wake me up_

_Wake up inside_

_Call my name and save me from the dark_

_Bid my blood to run, before I come undone-_

Someone behind capping

"Wow, yacker, I didn't know you can sing," said ,undenibly, Eddie.

"What are _you_ doing,"

"What do you mean, Patricia"

"Why the hell are you in here"

"One, I need to ask you a question. Second, I was gonna wait in your room 'till I heard you sing."

"Well, seriously, I am nude"

"Fine by me" he said with his bad boy smirk that only surface once this, this being that moment.

"Fine what's your question," I said, getting out of the shower and putting my cloths for me, I just got in when he clapped so I was barley wet**(Not like that)**.

"Why did you dump me"

"I-I-I was protecting you"

"Protecting me from what?'

"I looked at the clock in the bathroom and said, "Oh, look at the time, I gotta go."

~line break~

I got to work just on time.

"Hey, claire, what song?" I asked, putting on a fake smile.

"2 songs, really. "Marilyn Monroe" by Nicki Minaj and "Beautiful Bride" by Flyleaf"

"Oh,cool," I said as I got set up backstage.

~Three hours later~

I got back to the house ,and I was greeted by the one person, Eddie. He dragged me into his room and threw me on his bed. He looked the door and sat next to me.

"Protecting me from what"

"Me. I mean, my job is almost fake, I am so ugly in various ways, no one in my family can make love last, and besides, isn't K.T the 'girl of your dreams',"I said, very fastly.

"1st, what _is_ your job. 2nd, you are the most goreous girl on this plant ,in various ways. 3rd, I can help who be the first person in your family to make love last, and K.T isn't the 'girl of my dreams' and it wasn't really a dream, it was more if a daymare. You're the girl of my dreams," he said. Did he really feel this way for me? Or was it a prank?

"My job, well, it's kinda of a singer, expect no one can know it's me singing. Oh please, name _three _things of my that are 'goreous'."

"Your eyes, I can glare into them all day long, if you let me, and if you look close enough you can see red, ruby-like lines in your pubils then saphire line where the color part of your eyes are. Your nose, the cutest thing ever. Your skin is flawless, smooth, soft and the best shade of pale. Your body is perfect. Your lips are full ,yet thin and I just...wanna...kiss...them...all day long," Eddie moved towards my lips and smashed his on mine. I gave in. It wasn't long before his shirt was of and so was mine. He pulled away.

"I'm not gonna have sex with you, yakker."

"Let me guess, you finally relized what I look like"

"No, because I don't have a condom and you can get pregnet and I don't want to do that with, just yet. I mean, I wanna have kids with you, but no just yet"

"Oh. Well, wadda wanna do," Eddie smiled at me.

"I dunno, talk I quess"

"Oh ok. What did you mean by I have a perfect body, and what da hell did by best shade of pale"

Eddie smiled and said,"Go look in the mirror". I did. "Take off your skirt and fishnet tights" I gave him a confused look and he gave me one of those Just-do-it-okay looks. I did, and looked at myself. "Now, what do you see." he asked me. "I see an ugly, fat, untalented girl."he looked at me and chuckled.

"I see a girl whos is goreous, skinny, but not too skinny, and extremly talented." I smiled and turned around and kissed him. "You mean that," I asked. "Of caurse, I do. I love you and I'll never leave you," he said. We laid back on the bed and snuggled close to him. "Hey, yaker," he said.

"yeah."

"When's the next time you go to work,"

"In two days,"

"Oh, okay, good." He said as he hugged me and kissed my head. I fell asleep in his arms.

Maybe I can escape this hellhole.

**I am so so sorry it took me so long to update this, I had writers block. Anyways, I hope you like/loved it. Leave a review.**


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